Walking With Your Head Held High . . .

My friends and I had an interesting conversation tonight. It was about confidence. We were standing in line, waiting to get into an auditorium to see a play, and becoming increasingly annoyed at people who wanted to but us (we were the first in line). We inched forward little by little, as if to show the people in front who stood next to us, who was really first.

We mentioned that if we had more confidence we would tell them straight off that the back of line was clear back there, and what they were doing was rude. However, we did not. But it got us discussing how many things you could get away with when you are confident. If you walk with your head held high and like you own the place, rarely will people stop you. You could pull off any outfit and people will admire your spunk and creativity. People respect you because you are sure of who you are.

Earlier in the day we discussed how some people were made to make others look better. Foil Characters is what I called them. Stupid people make smart people smarter, ugly people make beautiful people more beautiful, etc. It got me to thinking, as my friend and I discussed, that in all reality I'm one of those foil characters, but not entirely. My confidence level does not shoot through the roof, but I'm not one to be completely disappear into the shadows to make another person seem much more beautiful or witty. I think that is something that I need to work on. Being more confident, leaving my shell a little more, walking with my head held higher and my shoulders a little more back (not in my custom slouch), and leave my foil character behind.

I Didn't Know I Could Love A Movie More Than Pride and Prejudice

I didn't think it was even possible to love a movie more than I loved Jane Austen's Pride and Prejudice, but last weekend proved me wrong. My best friend and I got together last weekend to watch the BBC Miniseries North and South based off of Elizabeth Gaskell's novel about the Industrial Revolution in England, on a few peoples recommendations. During the entire movie we were both on pins and needles freaking out as we watched the drama unfold between these two characters. It was more intense than P&P and so much more realistic. I loved that they showed both sides of the Industrial Revolution, from the rich merchant class (Mr. Thornton, that gorgeous man) to the poor street urchins, with Margaret Hale (the main lady) acting as the middle ground between these two groups.

It was ultimately a romance of misunderstandings and pride, but it was so well put together, and the ending just made me melt. I can't believe that I have went my entire life without seeing this movie in all of its splendor and grief and gorgeous men (her brother Fredrick is also very attractive). The themes behind the movie, the romance, the videotography, and the musical score, made this an amazing movie that is definitely my favorite.

"There is more than one way to burn a book."

I was actually really surprised how much I liked Fahrenheit 451. I came into the book, not expecting a whole bunch. It was just a book about burning books, right? Not even. I really enjoyed Bradbury’s writing style, and his book set me thinking about it. I keep on referring back to it in my thoughts and make brief comments about it in conversations. It shocked me in his afterword, that slowly throughout the years, his book about censorship has been censored, cut down, minimalized. All the swear words were taken out of the novel, it was condensed for school versions, and it shocked me because I realized that we do that already. We shorten books; take out things that offend us, really, what else are abridged novels for.

I actually realized that I am against the censorship of books already, I hate reading the abridged books because I feel like I don’t get the whole scope of the novel. That is why I read the unabridged Les Miserables by Victor Hugo and The Count of Monte Cristo by Alexander Dumas, just to name a few. I don’t mind at all that they are over one thousand pages in length.

I loved the themes represented in the book. The reality vs the technology represented in the parlor room, life, death, casual war. For some reason it really hit home especially looking at all the changes that are happening in the world right now. I don’t think that that type of censorship will ever happen, but I see a world where change is happening, other countries look at us with disgust, intelligence becoming less and less important, our students not wanting to learn. I felt myself being shocked by this book, but loving it at the same time, and I’m glad to say that if this really would happen I think I would find myself with the book-keepers or be in the same company with the lady who burnt herself with her books.

Because a life without books is really no life at all.

Forgetting to Take Time

Fall is one of my favorite times a year. I say that a little posthumously here since snow has already graced the ground, but I can't pass by my favorite season without saying something. I love the crisp sweater weather and the gorgeous colors on the trees and the food like firm and sweet apples and turkey. But lately it has seemed to go by so fast. I haven't enjoyed the season much this year because summer left so late and winter came too early.

I walked home from school the other day, the first time I have in a while, and thought about all the things that I am forgetting to take time to do. I should spend more time with my family, more time giving service, more time being a good friend. But I haven't. I've been stuck focusing on myself, what homework needs to be done, what colleges I should apply for, me, me , me, me. As I was walking I felt ashamed that I have been so self-centered, so focused on what I think I need I forget to take the time for what is really important.

That is what I love about walks. They give time for reflection, where there is none in this crazy busy world. They give time to find out who you really are. I find them incredibly relaxing, and it made me miss the morning walks that my best friend and I would take early in the summer mornings. I missed that, this past summer. I miss the time that we put aside just to talk like we can't in school. I miss the beautiful morning air, and the vigor it gave me to finish off my day with energy.

Maybe I should take more time and go for a walk more often. Maybe I should do self-reflections a little more and discover myself. Maybe I can do better and not be so self-focused. Maybe, just maybe I won't forget to take time for what really is important

What Will I Do?

I don't know how much I actually like the idea of Obama being president, I guess for being only seventeen I'm pretty conservative. But I have resigned myself to the fact that that is how its going to be and since I'm to young to really vote I have to accept the reality of the countries decision. He'll give us change all right, but I don't think that its the change that we are looking for, the words socialist and communist immediately coming to mind.

Even though some may say that I am stuck where I am, there are always other options. I can move to Canada :) or I can accept the fact and try to be the best United States citizen that I can be. I chose the later because why fight against something that I can't change. I'm not saying that I will be a passive person who stands by and would watch the government fail, but I guess I'm limited to simply voting (in 6 months!) and voicing my opinion, and I'll try very hard not to impose my opinions on others.